However, recent allegations about career fair attendee Moogle have sparked outrage and confusion amongst the WPI community. “Yeah, I got a promising email from a software dev company,” says senior Gary Phelgman, “… but in the follow up they said it was them, not me.” 

The Boston-based tech startup has reportedly been “totally ghosting” students across campus. “Moogle scheduled an interview with me” stated junior Becca Cabble, “and then stood me up! They said they were ‘seeing other prospects.’” 

As a result, some students have started to grow tired and cynical with the job search. One had this to say: “I was a ‘great fit’ for the position and they couldn’t wait to ‘take me back to their office’. Bull. Shit. I bet they use that line on everyone.” At press time, Moogle spam emails have continued to carpet-bomb student’s inboxes with false hope and deceit. Students have accused the company of “interviewing around” , “two-timing”,  and of being, “afraid of commencement”.

Others say that the company has unrealistic standards. Students cite company requirements to have 6 years of experience, 6 personal references, and to have a GPA over 3’8” as “just not possible” for the average recent college grad. “Resume size shouldn’t matter,” says Phelgman, “It’s how you use what you have that counts.”

Moogle has since released an official statement to quell the student backlash: “We really are just waiting for the right person. Until then, we’re not sure if we’re even looking for anything long-term. It’s just the first interview- we don’t owe you jobs or anything”.

Despite being affectionately dubbed, “The Shittiest Company on Earth,” by the rejects, Moogle still receives hundreds of desperate applications. We can only hope that one day Moogle will swipe right on its Computer Sci-ince Charming. Until then, unlike the resume in your reply, don’t get too attached.

First up is prepping the night before. If you haven’t already started to do this you are probably screwed and shouldn’t even bother showing up tomorrow. Make a list of all the top places you could be putting that half finished degree to work at, it helps to try and aim for places you think won’t have long lines. Raytheon, Microsoft, and Boston Scientific should be at the top of your lists.

Next up is dressing the part. This year the Career Development Center will be stationing a newly hired Fashion and Uniform Cop (F.U.C) at the front door of the the Rec Center to make sure you look good enough to be let in. For guys, we recommend your dad’s oversized suit coat. Ladies, the skirt your roommate didn’t think was slutty enough last weekend is probably just long enough to be professional but still catch the attention of the fifty year old manager from the civil engineering company.

Finally you’re there. You made it into the Rec Center and you are sweating more than the kids who take gym class there every day. Make a beeline straight to the table of water bottles, drink a quarter of it and throw it out. Now head to your first company, the first thing you should tell them is that they are your number one company and your semester of calculus has prepared you for whatever job they have to offer. Your not one, but two terms as National Honor Society Treasurer will really stand out to them so make sure to force the senior behind you to wait an extra five minutes while you tell the employer how vital to the club you were.

Before you leave each table make sure to ask for their contact information and a koozie. Each table you go to will be looking for how much swag you have picked up so far. If you can score a pen that also acts as a stylus you’re in. As the fair winds down to an end and you leave the Rec Center, save each of those business cards you got and ditch recycling your name tag, you pay to go here right? Why give it back. Now comes the most important part, follow up follow up follow up. Those companies saw hundreds of people today and by sending an email, preferably with a signature that includes at least 5 clubs you are minorly involved in, will seal the deal.

Here at The Institute we aim to make the WPI Campus better and that starts with the reason we are all here. Teaching us to become a cog in the machine and just shut up and get a job at a massive corporation. Best of luck to you all and happy fairing.