WPI Greek Life Bans Solo Cups From All Fraternities
After reports surfaced over the weekend of a single Natural Light beer being poured into a solo cup somewhere on campus, the administration’s top...
COVID Testing Proctors Replaced with Inflatable Tube Men
Citing budget cuts and a realization that it was the easiest job in the world, WPI has begun replacing covid test administrators with large...
Foisie Name Stripped, But Digital Consciousness Remains
Many students were shocked today to see the face of WPI donor Robert Foisie on the propaganda screen of the Innovation...
The Institute Investigates: The George C. Gordon Saunas
Following a slew of student complaints about the scorching temperature of WPI’s George C. Gordon library, administration has announced a new direction for the...
Greasy Pretzels, Sticky Fingers to Top off $49 Million Innovation Studio
Despite pesky student feedback requesting, “a 21st century restaurant” and “literally anything that doesn’t make me gassy,” WPI is moving forward with bold plans...
WPI Waiver Fest 2k17: Safe, Legal, and with Just a Hint of Fun!
This week, The Student Waivers Office (SWO) announced its newest fun-filled campus event: Waiver Fest 2k17, which will be ‘duly executed’ on the quadrangle...
Administration Approves ‘Keystone Light XL’ Pipeline to Deliver Low Quality Beer to Fraternities
Under new administration, the Keystone XL pipeline has been seeking new ownership after deals with the US government fell through. Excitingly, this came with...
“Foisie’s Open Floor Plan Perfect For Closing Large Sections Off” Says WPI Administration
In last Monday’s press release, WPI administration clarified that the I&E room in Foisie Innovation Studio will be closed to the public starting on...
Amidst Controversy, WPI Plans to Release “Tech Quran”
WPI is chock-full of time-honored traditions. One such tradition takes place during new student orientation, where each freshman receives a ‘Tech Bible.’ The WPI...
Huge Pit Reopened, Marking Annual Burial of MQP Reports
Excavators were spotted in a blaze of mechanical fury early Monday morning by Atwater Kent¹. As any WPI veteran will tell you,...
