WPI Mom Rejoices that Son “Basically Invented” Heart Tissue

After news of a WPI scientific breakthrough flooded the internet earlier this week, local Worcester resident Barbara Baker quickly took to Facebook to share...

RBE Major Seeks Love at Beam Signing Ceremony

Sources reported Thursday that senior Robotics Engineering major, Tanner Brink, attended the Innovation Studio’s Beam Signing and Topping Off Ceremony in the hope of finding true...

BREAKING NOW: WPI Unveils Foisie Innovation Waterpark

WORCESTER, MA - In an unexpected development, reports are surfacing that WPI has just unveiled its latest capital improvement project. Workers on-site appeased anxious student onlookers, saying...

Tale of 54-Year-Old WPI Janitor Grad to Hit the Big Screen

Sources are reporting that Boston natives Matt Damon and Ben Affleck are putting the finishing touches on the script for their upcoming film, “Better...

Introducing SNAP X Premium Shuttles; Sleek, Luxurious, Still Not on Time

As part of an exciting new initiative to suck less during the 2017-2018 academic year, WPI’s SNAP transportation service has unveiled its new premium...

Endangered Fraternity Chapter Shut Down After Negligent Parent Lets Child Wander From Tour

The internet is in a tizzy after videos surfaced last week of a young boy wandering into a fraternity house. Four-year old Johnny Johnson,...

Lone Asshole Takes Up Entire Table Meant for Six

At approximately 3PM local time, sources reported that WPI sophomore Jerry Thompson walked right past the desks designed for individual use, and sat himself...

Sign the Petition: “Pokemon Go for Fitness” Gym Class

Because an unfortunate majority of our readers are now battling life-threatening addictions to a Japanese video game reboot, The Institute has decided to be...

Skull Embroiders “Exclusive” on Ribbons; Clears up Confusion

Facing concerns that their secret society wasn’t achieving high enough levels of attention, members of WPI’s senior honor society, The Skull, announced their initiative...

4 Fun Ways to Visualize Your Soul-Crushing College Tuition!

Happy first day of class! Lots of memories to be made this year and lots of cash to be spent. But how much cash?...